Avez vous un cuppa?

Yesterday, I was reminded of the quintessential PG Tips advert from the early 1970's. For those too young to remember, the advert featured an anthropomoporhic chimp in the Tour de France. He is offered assistance after crashing his bicycle, but refuses with the now legendary line, 'Avez vous un cuppa'. That, I am sad to say, is about the level of my command of the French language.

I blame it on Boulogne, or rather on the day trip I went on in 1962. After a rough crossing from Ramsgate, during which the decks were awash with the offerings of sea sick sailors, the 'Queen of the Channel' arrived in a grey and damp port. As part of the package, we were herded into something that resembled a hastily-converted dockside warehouse and served that pinnacle of French cuisine, fish and chips.

The whole experience was such a dismal one, that it took my parents another thirty years before they risked another foray on to the 'con-ti-non', as sixties sophisticates would have called the land on the other side of the English Channel. I suppose the view that we were visiting the continent of Europe did not bode well for our relationship with it, as even then, most British people saw themselves as a race apart. I often wondered which continent we thought that we belonged to.

Yesterday, a twelve year old visitor reminded me of how much the world has turned: she came to talk to me about 'Past the Town of Tribulation & Straight on to Derring Do'. I showed her photographs of Dotty, the Bengal cat of the book, and Lydney Docks, the model for the 'Old Harbour', but what she really wanted to know was the meaning of some of Grandma's 'strange sayings'. This was a particular challenge, as my visitor had spent most of her childhood in France and for her, English is a second language. I dug deep as I explained, 'lost a bob and found a tanner' and 'a voice like a glead under a door'.

After she left, I reflected on how my twelve year old self would have coped with a similar text in French. I think you probably already know the conclusion I reached!